I've had my throat cut !!!

I know nobody ever said being on Optifast was going to be easy but I feel like I've had my throat cut!! I made it to lunch ok and then till about 4pm - and then the hunger set in!! I lasted until 6.30 and had the shake and the steamed vegies. I feel much better now and have some jelly setting in the fridge to take to work tomorrow in case I get hungry again. I'm sure it'll be worth it in the end and it's only early days yet!

Went to my GP today and she said if anyone can do it I can. She said she's seen me try and try to lose weight over the years with little success and she knows this is the right thing to do - so that was encouraging.

I've done the weigh and the measurements and will share them all with you after the op. Strange aren't I but it will be a huge thing for me to share this with the world.

Thanks Karen & Myf for your wonderful encouragement - I read them and love them.

Here goes!!!

Had a call from the Clinical nurse at the Doc's surgery today. The dietician is on hols until 6th Feb so thought I might get out of the Optifast!

NO SUCH LUCK - I start tomorrow morning.

My dear darling husband (that's today he is) has decided he is going to replace breaky and dinner with Optifast as well! That will make life easier not having to cook him dinner and he could stand to lose a bit (I'm whispering this so he can't read it ok!).

Anyway here we go....wonder how long it'll be before I start whinging about Optifast?
Only 14 more sleeps....

I've done it now!

Well - that's it then.....I've paid the money to the Doctor! The countdown begins and I can't wait.
I've been thinking of all the reasons I really want to lose the weight. Some of them are common amongst all of us!

* I want to see my little girl grow up, get married - all the bells and whistles!
* I want to show her how to play tennis
* I want to play tennis myself!
* I want to be more physically able to help my older daughter Jess. If I was fitter I'd feel more able, capable and would cope much better. This would also give my husband (John) more freedom.
* I'd like to feel sexy again.
* I want to go on holidays to an Island resort and feel great about being there - I would never even go there the way I am at the moment.
* I don't want people making allowances for me anymore.

There's a lot of "I's in there but I also think it's time to make it all about me.

My Before Photo....

OK - this is a biggie. I absolutely hate this photo but it confirmed in my head why I am having the banding done. It is quite confronting to see myself in this photo and even bigger to share it on the blog. I'm calling this my "BEFORE" photo....never again will I be like this.

A LITTLE ABOUT ME & MY FAMILY

I found out when I was in my early 20's that I have an under active thyroid (it is in the family). Then in my late 20's I found out I also have PCOS which explains a lot and is probably the main reason I have weight issues. I am now pre-diabetic and have started having joint problems.

I had a baby in 1989 (Jess) who has multiple disabilities and is now 18. I now believe I did what any mother would do and put her first and forgot about me. I gave up all forms of sport and exercise and still ate! But I would do it again as she is worth it. Jess uses a wheelchair for mobility, is intellectually disabled and has Epilepsy.

I then went on to have another baby in 2000 (see how infertile I am!) who is turning 8yrs old (Caitlin) - she is normal whatever that is!

Amongst all that I do have a very supportive husband who is behind me all the way.

I also work full time for TAFE and love it. But as you may imagine I do have a very busy life so I need to lose this weight to keep up with myself!

How I want to look again.....

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OK so I'll never be 17 again but I'd sure like the body back!

Looking Forward...........

The aim of this blog is to keep a personal log of my journey from here on. I am having Gastric Banding on Feb 12 08 and am excited at the thought of no longer being the "fat chick" in the room. I hope this blog is an inspiration to others as well as a kick in the bum to myself every now and again!

I have a story I've heard a million times - I've been fat for most of my life. I was a very active child and teenager. As I got older I became less active and ate more. Hence I am "Morbidly Obese". I have about 60kg to lose and am not up to sharing what I weigh with anyone yet.

This will be a very emotional journey I'm sure but I'm lucky to have a great husband, parents and friends - all of whom I will be depending on for moral support.

Anyway - here goes...